Goodbyes are hard, aren’t they?  My eyes are welling up with tears as I write this.  But all good things must come to an end.  People come into your life, and people go.  Sometimes, when you become so comfortable with someone, and you accept all their idiosyncrasies – the good and the bad – you think they will be a part of your life forever.  Only to have to say goodbye when you least expect it.

And, so, it is with a sad and heavy heart, that I say goodbye…

to Burrito Butt!

Quick!  Someone grab me a box of tissues — I’m about to start crying again! 

NO!!!  Not BURRITO BUTT!  Anyone but Burrito Butt!  How can I go on living without my Mexican food? 

He was texting me nonstop for weeks.  For new readers of the blog, I wrote about him here and here.  Even though I’ve written only two entries about him, in reality he’s been to see me about a dozen times.   Our first encounter was really hot, and then things rapidly cooled off.  At least on my end.  The problem was I didn’t know how to tell him.

So I kept avoiding his text messages.  Until one day, I just said, fuck it – come on over.  I was prepared, though.  If you recall, I didn’t like his pre-sex cleaning ritual with my white towels.  So this time, I just said, ever so diplomatically,

Hey sweetie, why don’t you make yourself at home and take a nice hot shower?

Just like that: problem solved.  At least one of the problems.  The other major problem — one that I also didn’t know how to tell him — was that I kept going soft on him.  Well, he knew I kept going soft.  Puh-leeze, he could feel me going soft inside him.  He just didn’t know why I kept going soft.

I kept going soft because, after the first 30 seconds, after his first moans of ecstasy, I couldn’t feel any friction on my candy.  His asshole was very relaxed.  Too relaxed.  Loose, even. 

Alright!  You got me it was a fucking gaping black hole.

It was  like tossing a hot dog into the Grand Canyon. 

Of course, you can’t tell a guy he’s got a loose asshole, any more than you can tell a girl she’s got a loose pussy.

So I blamed myself.  I told him it was because he needed a bigger shecock.  I told him he needed to go play with a Latin or black girl.  That’s right — in this crappy economy I’m sending away customers — I must be crazy.

Oh, Cassandra, he said to me with such earnest sincerity, as if this was a source of perpetual anguish for him. 

But I’m just so tight down there!

Yeah, I thought to myself.  About as tight as the Gulf of Mexico. 

And so this last time he came over, a minute or so after we started fucking, my candy felt absolutely nothing and started going soft again.  I was just about to start my little spiel when he told me that he did go see another Tgirl.

She was a very hot Latina.  With a gigantic 9” shecock.  But the experience ended up being very physically painful for him.  He said she rushed him.  Just rammed that gigantic 9” shecock inside him without giving him time to adjust.  And then took his money and kicked him out.  He said his asshole was hurting for days.

Yeah, but didn’t it “hurt so good?”  I asked him, mischievously.

No, it’s not supposed to hurt.  He said this very emphatically.  It’s supposed to feel good. 

And then he said something that totally surprised me:

That’s why I like coming to see you.  I always have so much fun with you because you take your time with me.

My jaws just about dropped to the floor.  Here I am, complaining about having him as a client, writing some not-so-kind posts about him in my blog, and forgetting that he is a very decent guy who’s spending a significant chunk of his paycheck to have fun with me (Cassandra don’t do discounts just cause you’re blue collar). 

The simple honesty of the compliment caught me off guard.  He didn’t say I was the hottest Tgirl (which would be a lie).  He didn’t say I had the biggest shecock (which would be an even “bigger” lie).  He just said he has so much fun with me.  And this simple declaration moved me.  A lot.

I told him to wait.  I went to the bathroom and popped an ENTIRE Cialis pill (the usual dosage is either half or a quarter).  And then I smoked a couple big bong hits of weed.  I didn’t care if I was tossing my candy into the Grand Canyon and fucking the Gulf of Mexico my candy was going to be THROBBING HARD doing it!

I fucked him in every position possible: doggy, missionary, him riding me, sideways.  I still couldn’t feel anything, but I pounded him so hard in every position that he had this glassy look in his eyes.  I fucked his brains out.  And then he got down on his knees and swallowed my load. 

But my candy was still so hard from the Cialis that he took it into his hands and started rubbing both our cocks together for him to cum.

Normally my candy is very sensitive after I cum and it hurts to touch it.  It was still sensitive, but due to the Cialis, instead of pain his rubbing of our cocks together just felt ticklish.  I tried to take my cock away, tried to tell him that it was starting to hurt but he was a man possessed.  I had fucked him into another world and he had the intensely focused look of a mad man.  He pushed away my hand.

And then I started to whimper.  Ahn, aaah, ow, oh, eee, ooo, aw, hoo.  Tried taking back my cock again but he pushed my hand away and stroked our cocks together even harder.

By now the whimper has turned to a slight giggle.  It didn’t hurt so much because my candy was still rock hard from the pill.  It just felt ticklish.  He hehe, hehehehehehe, I moaned under my breath.

And he stroked our cocks together even harder — this man was possessed. 

Now I’m full on laughing.  I can’t control myself.  I am shrieking with laughter.

HA HA HA AHAHHAHAHAAHA HAHAHA HAHAHAH HA HA HA HA HA !!!!

And still he kept stroking our cocks — even faster.  This was one man who wanted his orgasm.  I am full on screaming with laughter but he won’t stop.

HAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAH HA HA HA HAHAHA HA!!!

Finally, he shoots: big gobs of thick white ropes all over my stomach.  And I’m still laughing!

Out of breath, he asks me, WHAT’S SO FUNNY?

I can barely make out the words.  I still have the hysterical giggles:

Ha hahah I… hahah haha.. AM…   haha  SO SSSTONED!  And I break into another fit of laughter.

He gets up, cleans himself up.  Looks at me with a puzzled expression.  I try to get a grip — it’s time to collect money.  I look at myself in the mirror behind my bed to freshen up.

My lipstick is completely smeared.  My wig is askew.  False eyelashes barely hang on to my lids.  I look like a crazy mad woman.  Who won’t stop laughing.

HAHAHAHAH HAHAH HA!! I am pounding on my mattress with my right fist.  I can’t breathe.  Help me.  HELP ME.  I want to stop laughing.

And that was the last time Burrito Butt ever came to see me.

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Tags: Cialis, filthy gorgeous, followup, Grand Canyon, Gulf of Mexico, Saying goodbye, Stoned out of my mind, tranny fucking a nice hot man's ass, unexpected Hallmark moments, weed